Wanderlust In Small Doses

Twists and turns have been pulling me away from my blogging, although travel is never far from my mind. As I try to make plans and save for my next vacation, I find myself wishing that I'd been more adventurous while I was in college or even after college when I didn't have so many responsibilities to manage. How much fun it might have been to take off and explore Europe for weeks, months, or even years at a time. Now I have to wait for the few times a year when I can venture away from my desk, my home, my work, my real life to immerse myself in a completely different place, even if it is for just a few days.

Over the past couple of weeks I've asked myself what stopped me from taking off after college for places unknown. When I reflect on that time I can remember that I was more concerned (worried)  with creating a stable life for myself especially after having lived a precariously unpredictable one for so many years. The thought of wandering around aimlessly without a sense of where I would lay my hat (or purse) next did not appeal to me at all. All I could think about then was having my own place with my own set of keys and maybe a coffee maker. I craved stability, coziness, and peace at that time more than stamps on a passport. Also, I'm pretty sure that I was scared of being anymore uncomfortable than I'd already been in my life. Back then I was proud that I moved three hours from my home to attend college in a town surrounded by corn fields. On the way to school I actually cried when I saw a post office that was only the size of a small house.

Floating back to the present, I'm happy that I did what was best for myself at the time.  Now when I come home I get the feeling I had hoped for when I was younger- warmth, peace, safety-happy to be home. So, I guess for now I will continue to feel grateful for my short travels and make plans to tap into my wanderlust when I retire. God, please let me retire...at some point.

The place where I now sit and have my coffee